Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Rare Words in my Productive Vocabulary: Inveterate, by Glenn

Apparently, the most relevant image to the word 'inveterate'.

In a desperate search for easy content, I have decided to play a game once a week. That is, once a week, I will probe my powerful mind for the rarest word I can think of at that moment. I will then take that word and enter it in a google search. The first non-dictionary website to turn up will be discussed. Fun will be had.

This week I considered using 'hirsute', because I am harrier than Ben Affleck. But that reminded me that 'hirsute' is the default expression to describe all hirsute celebrities. In other words, it ain't rare. In fact, its association with trash gossip magazines is like a garden-hose enema for my inner lexicographer.

Pictured: Inveterate reader who is too young to be an inveterate anything, let alone something she learned to do last week.

Instead, I elected to search for websites containing the word 'inveterate', as in 'inveterate gambler, womanizer', whatever. It is a word with a negative connotation that roughly maps onto 'persistent' and 'incorrigible', which is very useful if you want to insult somebody with a serious psychological problem, but still want to come off as classy or pedantic or only mildly dickish.

The first non-dictionary hit I got was a blog called 'Inveterate Bystander'. My initial intention was to give an in depth review, but the first post I read was shite pseudo-philosophical drivel.

It is titled Benjamin Libet & Free Won't. On top of being pretty well unreadable at the sentence level, the logical, nay mystical, inferential leaps inserted throughout the post caused my mind's sphincter, my 'brown eye' if you will, to pucker in a way that was at once unpleasant and satisfying, as if my years of education had finally born fruit, and some undigested peanuts.

Like a well trained dog, I have learned to ignore feces. Horray for me.

I don't know why I am surprised by the quality of the post. The name of the blog alone should have given me a clue. The author apparently fancies himself an incorrigible and persistent witness to the human condition. Also, he chose to use the word inveterate in the title. If that doesn't say pretentious douchebag, then I just shat myself. (Hint: I may have sharted, but I did not exceed the 1 teaspoon threshold for it technically to be considered shitting myself. Thus, buddy is a douchebag, and I smell a little like ass).


Painting called "The Steadfast Philosopher".

Sunday, May 11, 2008

The 6 Most Gratuitously Cleavaged Women on TV

Nudity and television have an uneasy relationship. Sex sells, but TV can't even show nipples.Television has found a happy medium in breast cleavage--that innocent eye candy for emasculated husbands and prepubescent boys alike.

read more digg story


This article is about inappropriate cleavage rather than cleavage per se. The editors removed a sentence I had in there that made this distinction more clear. They also edited the shit out of it in other ways. I liked it better the way it was originally, but that is a writer's conceit.

Of course, I don't want to oversell it. It is still about 70% my writing, for good or bad.